Mama Said Knock You Out

Here’s an awfully dangerous idea from Grantland: The “If I Fought This Rapper, Would I Win?” Chart: “a chart to help you figure out if you should fight a particular rapper, should you somehow be in position to do so and of the mind to do so. It was inspired by the recent standoff the LAPD had with, among others, the Game and T.I., two rappers you should definitely never, ever try to fight.”

The most lethal is DMX. But right up there with him is 50 cent: “He got shot 700 times in the head and didn’t die. What are you gonna do to him in a fight? Don’t do it. Don’t fight Fif.” As for Common: “And a 100 percent chance that he just straight-up kills you. Did you even see Wanted, bro? He can bend the flight of bullets. Don’t do it. Don’t get ghost-assassinated by Common.”

Eminem and Pitbull, meanwhile, get no respect (though the latter is great when it comes to charter schools).

All in all, brilliant.

Hat tip: Mike Woody

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